R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
