i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize