I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
