Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
