What a fucking waste of an outfit
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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