Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
my being single is dangerous.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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