my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
