I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
