does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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