The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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