I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
