Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
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