Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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