Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
