Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
