Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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