If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
