I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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