I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
