your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
