i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
