Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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