ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
