apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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