you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
