he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
