I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize