I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Randomize
