You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
