I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
