Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
