I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I am one with the molecules
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
