her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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