If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
