Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
