i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
