I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
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