i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
