Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
