trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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