Having a random hookup so left but love u
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
