i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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