Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
