we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
