i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Sext me about skeletons
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
