new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I love having hate sex.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
