toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
