We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
