Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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