What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
